So, this long weekend brought with it a pretty major revelation. But, let me back up a little bit first…
My sister and her husband live in another city so we don’t see them very often. This long weekend, they decided to come to the farm to spend time with us and our parents. Since we would all be spending the whole weekend together, D and I decided to tell my sister and brother-in-law about the pregnancy.
We haven’t been telling other people – and we plan on waiting a while until we do – but my parents know and I didn’t want to spend a whole weekend trying “fake it” with my sister. It’s hard to act normal when I feel like shit and am totally exhausted. Along with the fact that I can’t lift Littleman and I’m not drinking, trying to hide the pregnancy becomes a bit ridiculous.
So, in preparation for the weekend, I called my sister to tell her the news. Her reaction was a bit underwhelming. But sometimes she just like that, so I didn’t let it bother me. I also think that people aren’t totally sure how to react after our loss. I mean, I know my parents are excited but, like us, don’t want to get too excited in case something goes wrong.
Anyway, we headed up to the farm on Friday morning. When we got here, there was a bit of situation with one of the horses that stays on our property, so the day was spent with a bunch of strangers here. (I’ll save the horse story for another post).
With such a busy day, we didn’t get to really hang out as a family. We all ate lunch separately and spent most of the day rushing around and helping people out however we could. By the time things quieted down, we decided it was time for some appetizers. As we were putting together some dips and crackers, my sister and her husband disappeared for a minute. When they came back into the kitchen, they were carrying a tray of cupcakes. Huh? It’s not dessert time yet.
My sister set down the tray and we all leaned in for a closer look. Written on the cupcakes was “Baby” and “Due February”. WHAT? After a moment’s pause, we all realized that they weren’t referring to me. My sister is pregnant!!!
She said the reason for her less-than-enthusiastic reaction to my news is that she was so shocked. No effing kidding. I almost fell over when she told us.
Our due dates are 5 days apart. If all goes as planned, Bo will have a cousin the exact same age.
It’s now two days later and I’m still having mixed feelings about it. Obviously, I’m thrilled for my sister. I know she wanted kids and I don’t think she’s been trying for too long, so all of this is great for her. And, I’m very glad that I’m pregnant too. I definitely know that the news would be a whole lot harder to take if I wasn’t. (You may recall my fear of her getting pregnant a few months ago).
I’m still scared, though. I had been doing very well this week with the whole “staying positive” thing, but this announcement has freaked me out a bit. What if something goes wrong with this pregnancy? I’ll have a constant reminder of exactly how far along I should be or how old my baby should be forever and ever.
I know I shouldn’t think like that, so I’m trying to let it all out here and now. After this, I will try to shake it off and go back to my positive place.
Because, when I really look at it, this crazy coincidence of cousins is a pretty amazing thing.