It’s all relative

Sometimes when I’m feeling particularly sorry for myself, I’ll see something on the news or hear about something bad that’s happened to someone else.  Then, I’ll feel guilty for feeling sorry for myself because other people have it a lot worse than me.

My best friend (who is very wise) is a social worker and an incredibly good listener.  She always reminds me that it’s all relative.  While my situation may not be as horrible as something that’s happening to someone else, it’s horrible for ME.  And I shouldn’t feel guilty about it.

Right now, my heart is going out to a close family friend who is going through something pretty awful himself right now.  My family was supposed to be attending a wedding on the weekend.  The youngest son of a family we’ve grown up with was planning to get married on Saturday.  A couple of days ago – just a week before the wedding – the bride-to-be called it off.  How horrible.  I feel awful for him and it just breaks my heart.

Everything was planned and paid for.  Friends and relatives were travelling to another town for the celebration.  Now they have to tell everyone that the is wedding off.

Obviously, I don’t know the whole story.  We don’t always know what goes on behind closed doors.  But, times like this remind me that we all have pain.  And that no one’s pain is worse that the next guy’s. 

For me, my miscarriage and subsequent D&C were the worst things that have ever happened to me.  Those were the hardest, most painful days I’ve ever had to get through.  Some may look at that and think I’m lucky because I haven’t been through worse.  I look at it and think my wise friend is right.  It’s all relative.

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One thought on “It’s all relative

  1. How awful for him! But you’re right- it doesn’t diminish what you have been through. Pain is pain, and we’ll all deal with our share of it in this lifetime. To me, this kind of thing serves as a reminder to always be kind, as you never know what kind of pain those you encounter are trying to deal with. My sympathies to your friend…

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