Earlier this winter, D and I discussed the idea of going south for a one-week vacation. We’ve always loved the beach and it felt like we could use a little getaway this year. Then, in early January, we found out I was pregnant. Knowing how many expenses we would have in the coming year, we did the responsible thing and vetoed the vacation.
Now that we’ve lost the baby, we’re thinking that maybe we could use that vacation after all. Physically, I’ve recovered from the D&C. Emotionally, we’re both still grieving but trying to stay strong so that we can get on with our day-to-day routines. We’re hoping that some time away together will help us to relax and refocus so that we can move forward.
The big decision was whether or not to bring Littleman away with us. We’re not crazy overprotective parents or complete homebodies, but we’ve actually only ever spent one night away from Littleman. OK, that’s not technically true. I have only spent one night away from Littleman. D is a firefighter who works different shifts, so he has spent quite a bit of time away from both of us for his work.
We are lucky enough to have people we trust who Littleman loves: my parents and my best friend (his godmother). They have offered numerous times to stay with him whenever we need some time to ourselves and now we’re finally ready to take them up on that offer.
Leaving Littleman behind definitely causes some anxiety for me, but I know that he’ll be happy and well cared for. In fact, he’ll probably barely notice that we’re gone! And, I’ve come to realize that our happiness matters too. I think a little change of scenery is exactly what D and I need right now.
Hopefully when we return in a week, we’ll feel renewed, refreshed and ready to face whatever comes next.